I am so excited to meet you! I have been thinking about what you may be like since my ex and I split. I have high hopes that my ex will pick someone who is a good role model for our son. Whoever you are and wherever you are I want you to know a few things.
First, I am excited to meet you and to welcome you to the family. I want you to know that I am ok with you being my son’s other parent and I ok with it if my son wants to call you mom. After all, you will be a second mother to my son and be there when I am unable to be there since his father and I are not together anymore. I want you to know on mother’s day that this day isn’t just about myself but also about you. I hope that you will join my son and I (which will ultimately become your son as well) on this special day and we can all do something together. I want you to know your joining a team!
Second, If in the beginning I come off defense please do not take offense! I am just worried about the woman who will be another mother to my son and hopefully that this woman will not break his heart or treat him differently since he will not share the same DNA as her. I don’t want my son to feel not good enough because you are not his biological mother. You see my son has a huge heart and loves everyone and I don’t want that to change. Growing up, I also never pictured having to share my son or another woman being there to comfort my son when I can not. This is not easy but I promise to not let this mommy guard get the best of me.
Third, I hope we can become great friends and do things together, get to know another and more importantly do things with OUR son! There is no reason we cant be friends and all of us (including my ex and my husband) co parent together. After all when he is in your house you do parent him. I want you to be apart of decisions. He may become close to you and share things with you that he may not share with his father so I think you being involved in decisions is important.
Lastly, I hope you know I will expect you to be at or apart of every game, school play, holiday and of course mother’s day. There is no reason you should feel you need to be absent…you instead should feel the need to be present. It will not always be easy as I am sure we will not always see eye to eye but I want us to work together. You will be a huge part of my son’s life and I can’t wait for him to have you. I also will probably hug you a ton after we have gotten to know another, I myself have learned your perfect for my son the moment you get engaged. I will be beyond thrilled my son has another parent. Two parents are cool but four parents is even better. OUR son will have an even bigger support system and people he can go to for anything and everything.
I can’t wait to meet you!